you cant see the pegleg but its there. and i have that cool beard. for reals.
I was in the shower and i had a cool idea that turned into a content-lite link-heavy essay. Yay!
So here's the idea. Lets cut the bullshit and label political ideologies by their founders and/or prominent members, rather than they're boring philosophical names. This will make us remember history and help us understand why certain people are douchebags: they follow the thinking of douchebags.
Here's an example:
a Conservative is now equal to aBurkeian.
Burke was a douchebag who believed that tradition was better than rationality because of its accumlated wisom through the ages, so he felt the enlightenment, with all its rationality, was shit. Hence, conservative = Burkeian.
douchebag
Get it? Schools of thought are now named after there big name heroes. Just go with it.
Liberal = Lockeist
Libertarian = Smithian. Or maybe Randist is better. Ok, Randist is better.
Capitalist =Smithist
Marxist = um, Marxist still.
Communist = MarxandEnglesian.
Fascist = Mussolini-ian
Pragmatist = Pierceist. Fuck that guy, its Jeffersonist.
doesn't he look philosophical? blackbeardist.
Progressive = Teddyian
Anarchist = Proudhonist (You know the "Property is Theft! guy)
Theocrat = Rushdoonyian
Neoconservative = Straussian (This is actually a real term. Damn).
I am so allergic to cats.
Socialist: Ok this, by my dumb system, should be called Marxism, but thats taken to mean something different now. Damn. So I started looking at the modern movement that equates democracy with socialism, and the biggest name is George Orwell. His real name was Eric Blair. Therefore, a socialist is now a Blairist.
I mentioned Rushdoony's theocracy, but what about more moderate religious types affecting politics? I call them jesus's. As in, "hey, he's a jesus." I know, I know, that they're already christians and its 'jesus christ,' but that wasn't really his last name. Also, Jesusist sounds militaristic, and jesusarian sounds like a failed attempt at speaking an already stupid sentence. ("The cheese just are in")
So that means you've also got muhammed's, buddha's, etc. Hidus get to be ghandi's, cause i don't think there's a known founder.
this was on the google image search for young hippie for some reason.
All this seems great, you may be saying, but pegleghippie, didn't you make a big todo about being a technocrat? What douchebag are you named after?
technocrat= Scottian. Happy?
Even though I actually did a lot of reading and searching to write this essay, I am completely aware this is the dumbest thing I have ever written. As you can see, its mostly my studies in political philosophy thus far vomitted onto this otherwise very spiffy blog. If you actually read through my twisted little logical wordplay to this point, I can only assume you like me a whole lot and were being kind by reading.
All those people listed are interesting, although most of them are jerks. Even Scott. But Maybe the one good side of this essay is a little compendium of political thinkers. I do not know what compendium means.